One Very Important Thing You Must Do Before Searching/Choosing a Partner

While some take the issue of choosing a life partner lightly, I think it is something one has to be very conscious, careful and intentional about. While there are different aspects to watch out for e.g spiritual, physical, financial or emotional aspects, there is something you need to work on, something very important and personal you need to do before you go about your search for your significant other.

It is very important that you find yourself first before you find a partner. Find out who you are, develop your self consciousness to a reasonable extent, find out what you really want out of life and ensure to have tried to live life by yourself.

Without the adequate self knowledge of who you are, what you want, and your purpose in life, it may be very difficult for you to attract the kind of partner you want and in the process of trying to figure it out while in one relationship or the other, you may end up breaking more people than you are aware of/ imagined – unconscious, unintentional but necessary heartbreaks.

Hence, it is very important that you understand your needs, and answer the question, “what do I really want?” honestly within yourself before you embark on that search.

Self awareness is vital, and relationships thrive where both partners have adequate self-mastery/ knowledge and can integrate it into building a healthy relationship.

Are you in a relationship you feel is at the verge or the end of a romantic chapter? Do you see yourself gradually or completely loosing yourself or your identity in a relationship? Do you often sacrifice your own happiness in order to conform to the needs of your partner?

Take the cue to take a breather.

This is not for you to begin another search for who to fill the gap without first answering the question, “what do I want?”

If you find yourself another partner without fully healing or figuring out that need/want, you will end up in a vicious cycle and repeat the process. Eventually you may have to settle for just any one when you get tired of the counts.

Break ups are hard, I know; and hurtful. It leaves you wondering, ‘what did I do wrong?’, but if you need to take a step away from relationships in order to create a new story, discovering yourself – who am I? What do I really want for myself? To gain new insights, grow and develop into a version of yourself that is more self aware, take that step. This is the time to find yourself, to seek clarity and get reacquainted with your needs.

To the singles out there who are yet to commit to a relationship, I hope you find this post helpful and know that being alone or single is not a bad bad thing, I understand that there might be pressure at times, from friends in relationships, social media or family, but don’t feel sorry for yourself, try as much as possible to invest so much in your personal development and spend time finding you. Who knows? Perhaps in finding you, you’ll find him.

To the married and already committed folks who feels like they’ve missed it and can barely recognize themselves or have forgotten about their own needs or wants, I see you and I’m sending you all the hugs and warmth here. But mind you, it’s not too late for you to rediscover yourself. Not at the expense of your relationship, marriage or family though. Open up to them about it because you will be needing their support a great deal.

In conclusion, we cannot be ‘all careful” though, hence, the need to find THE ONE who gives life its meaning and purpose – God. It is easier to find yourself when you’ve found and let Him take the lead.

I would love to read your review in the comment section. If this has blessed you, kindly share to encourage others too. Sharing is caring.