When Life Gets Overwhelming

If you’ve not felt overwhelmed recently, hands in the air, please.

The daily challenges of life can cause one to be overwhelmed and anxious. One thing we should understand is the fact that feeling overwhelmed is a natural part of life. However, it is detrimental to our mental health when we allow this feelings too much or dwell on it for long. It doesn’t only affect our mental health, it affects our productivity too.

Responsibilities, emotions, expectations, stress amidst others can make us feel overwhelmed. We’ve got professional and personal obligations, dreams and hobbies we are chasing, plus a life we thought we had mapped out but reality is far different from the smooth and perfect journey we envisaged. All of these can be overwhelming, especially when you’re still struggling to figure life out in a world full of people who are obsessed and constantly putting their best self forward. It is easy to feel like everyone has more than you or everyone is doing better than you. Pressure sets in and you keep getting overwhelmed with issues and bothers of life.

We all feel overwhelmed sometimes, but usually, highly sensitive people are likely to get more overwhelmed than others.

When life gets overwhelming, here are five (5) things I do to pull through and out of it, asides recoiling and practicing a lot of self introspection:

1. GRATITUDE: I’ve learnt to reflect on God’s goodness and how far He has brought me. I see that through it all, He has been the one pulling me through and it has not been by my might or strength. So, when the thought or feelings of inadequacies come knocking at my door, I combat them with gratitude. Remember what you have now were things you were once worried about, so be grateful for where you are right now while working towards where you want to be.

2. PRAY, STUDY THE WORD OF GOD, SING HYMNS/LISTEN TO INSPIRATIONAL SONGS: Probably because I am a church girl or a preacher’s kid, I am not so sure, but I have always find solace in singing hymns, praying and reading the word of God whenever I feel overwhelmed.

Hymns such as ‘what a friend we have in Jesus’, ‘I have found a friend in Jesus’, ‘Count your blessings’, ‘It is well with my soul’, e.t.c. blesses my soul, and whenever I feel too weak to sing out loud, listening to inspirational songs on my phone, mostly by gospel artistes does the trick.

When it comes to scriptures, one of the scriptures I enjoy reciting/reading is Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end”. I so much love this particular bible verse, probably because it resonates so much with my name – Boluwatife, which means as the Lord wills/pleases.

Other scriptural passages that speak life and hope to calm any feeling of anxiety or overwhelm:

Isaiah 41:10, Matthew 6:34, Luke 12:25-26, Philippians 4:6-7, Matthew 11:28-30

So, no matter how overwhelming life can get, I have the assurance that God is in it for me and would see me through, as I pray to him for strength and clarity of mind to find purpose and walk therein.

3. REACH OUT TO SUPPORT SYSTEMS: I really can’t overemphasize the need for you to nurture healthy and positive relationship with people. Although, I am someone who spends a lot of time alone rather than with some companies, except on days I am at work, in church or I intentionally step out for social gatherings. Please note, I am not antisocial, neither am I lonely. I’ve got great friends and family who are supportive and wants me to succeed, they are my support system. When it gets overwhelming, I can turn to any of them for a quick pep talk. Also, these ones are usually quick to remind me that I inspire so many others and there are people out there who are also rooting for me, and that’s the energy I need to shake off whatever weight is pulling me down.

4. JOURNAL: Journaling is one thing that has helped me clear my mind. Over the years, I’ve come to realize that I tend to write more than I talk, even in the chat box when conversing with friends, rather than use voice note, I prefer typing because it helps me get what is in my head out faster/ express myself better. Hence, whenever life gets so overwhelming, my journal and pen comes to my rescue as I freely allow my thoughts to flow out of me onto the pages of the book. I actually see journaling as a form of mental release.

5. FOCUS ONLY ON THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL: While there are so much overwhelming life issues that may be out of our control, the truth is, we definitely have control over how we react or respond to it while focusing on the things we have control over. The earlier we understand this, the better it is for us. Many times, I get overwhelmed by a series of thought about the future, which really drained me, took a lot of my energy, yet it doesn’t make a difference because worrying doesn’t change a thing except there is an action to back it up. In the midst of it all, I’ve come to realize that focusing on things I can’t control seem to throw me in a state of complete helplessness that I become passive about some other things because it seems far reaching. It dawned on me much later that while I don’t have ultimate control over the outcome of everything, I’ve got control over some things and that is what I need to focus on and accept. It was a tough decision though as my mind struggled so much with this fact. I developed the mindset of ‘que sera sera’ – what will be will be, while ensuring I do my best to get a positive outcome.

This doesn’t mean that I am completely off worry, of course, only the dead has no worries, but the simple mind shift to focus on things I have within my control and try to make a difference, has been helpful. In summary, the mind shift is this: although, I may not be able to choose what the final outcome would be, but I would do my best to get an excellent result, hence, no matter the outcome, the realization that I did try my best is enough. Now, this is a huge lesson for me, I hope you find it helpful too. Save your energy and increase your productivity by focusing majorly on things within your control.

There are also some other basic things we can engage in to ease stress or worry, such as:

• Give yourself a healthy distraction when needed.
• Take a walk.
• Spend time with, and enjoy nature.
• Catch more sleep and rest.
• Drink enough water.
• Eat healthy.
• Learn to say No.
• Never compare yourself with others
• Learn to let go.
• Celebrate yourself and your wins, small or big.
• Exercise.

BOTTOM LINE

Feeling overwhelmed is not something we can easily avoid in today’s world, as long as man strives to become better and grow, he would experience it, but understanding how to deal with such feeling is a necessary skill/knowledge we need to acquire, to enable us control the feeling of being overwhelmed before it submerges us and we become a shadow of ourselves.